Hey Guys.
okay well I am currently being a terrible friend. I'm being completely petty and bitchy about something that I should be happy for. Okay. It's all about the whole Jaymie and Zack being together thing. And I know I should be happy. Like Jaymie gets lonely sometimes and I'm happy she found someone that makes her feel good. And Zack is cool and all. But no where near as cool as Justin who is like the world to me. I just feel okay I can't believe I'm going to admit this but like....
I feel like being with Justin made me special. That I was the girl who had the amazing boyfriend that everyone would die to have. It was like I was the only one around me who got fairy-tale answers from her dream guy.
And now I just feel like now that Jaymie has someone too. It takes the attention off of Justin and I. OMG. I'm such a petty attention wanting loser. UGH. It just sucks because okay hear me out...
Me and Justin live 30 minutes away from eachother. Jaymie and Zack live not that far away. Like at least they live in the same city. They even go to the same school. I'm so jealous. Not of them just the situation. Like they can see eachother. And text all day! ON TOP OF SEEING EACHOTHER EVERYDAY AT SCHOOL! I just want to cry. It's so unfair. And I know, I know. Life isn't fucking fair (your all like wow my mom never taught me that one). But I just hate it. Like they haven't even said I LOVE YOU yet! And I'm sitting over here bawling my eyes out everytime I have to leave him at the end of the day. I'm sitting over here going crazy, because I can't hold him like I'd want to. I can't be there for him during the day. I can't even CALL as much as I would like. It's so unfair though. The people that are so crazily in love that can't get enough of eachother who cry almost everynight when they have to say goodbye get to see eachother less than a couple who don't even love eachother. Yet anyway. Idk.
I just needed to let that out
Sorry I'm a whiny bitch,
I love you Jaymie I'm sowwy :(
Dezzy
4 comments:
I'm sorry. That must suck:( I hope things get better
:( :( :( :( :(
I'm sowwy.
I didn't want to have a relationship at school. Liek i was all fine with not seeing him except like when you see Justin. But the thing is. You love Justin and you know it. And I still get really nervous when I see Zack. I need to stop being so scared and just go see my boyfriend and be happy. If I wasn't so nervous every time and felt like I needed to get used to seeing him and kissing him (because today only makes 3 total kisses), then I wouldn't be seeing him in school. I would have kept it the way it was....never seeing him in school. i feel bad for like rubbing it in your face kinda that i can see him and all that. you're not a whiny bitch. i love you. you're the best friend in the world. i'm sorry for making you jealous. i'll try not to talk about him or anything when i'm around you. and i won't post about it anymore.
awww hey baby this is justin i love you sooo much :D
It's ok to feel that way. I'm sure you'll get used to Jaymie having a bf soon enough. =)
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